2 People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, 4 treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God— 5 having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people.

Last prayer meet, Ptr Connie asked us to split into groups and pray about 2 Timothy 3. She said to pray about a characteristic we're facing. Josh nudged me and said " you pray about ungrateful and without love la ", and I replied him " you pray abusive and proud la ". 

We both knew we were teasing each other when we said that, but somehow, deep down in my heart, I knew I had to pray for that, and an addition, Unforgiving. 

I have always, always, always tried to be a grateful person as I grow, and of course a person filled with love and forgiving. 
I tried doing things to reassure me that I'm such grateful, being able to have what I have. I always reflected on how grateful I am, did charity work to remind me of how grateful I should be to be having what God has provided me with. 

BUT, somehow its just not enough. I knew when he mentioned it, it was so spot on. I looked at the passage filled with 19 characteristics I could pray of, but none of it came to my mind except for these 3. 
I silently teared, hoping that Kelvin and Jen Hui wouldn't realize, so I added smiles and laughs while I teared, to assure everyone I was still in the midst of coming out with my prayer. 
As Kelvin has finished his part of praying for the nation, I gathered my guts, I knew I had to do this. I knew very much that I might regret not praying about it if the others let me go just like that, because I very well wanted it to be prayed, especially since I felt it so deeply.

Then I said it, " Dear Lord Jesus, I want to pray for the people of our generation who are ungrateful, without love and unforgiving. " When I said the 2 characteristics -- ungrateful and without love, I emphasized it by saying it loudly, to somehow tease Josh, in a way it was like " Nah, i'm really praying for it la ".

But as I carried on, I continued, " I pray that we will always be reminded the verse, we love because You first loved us. I pray that you'll always help us to love those who are unlovable, " I sobbed. They asked me what's wrong, and I sobbed harder. It was SO hard to control my feels.

Anyways, I forgotten what was the prayer I continued with after all the sobbing, but one thing I know is that, I am so glad to have prayed about it.
I really, really pray, and hope that God will work in my life, to guide me in being a more grateful, loving and forgiving individual.
I want, and I will, be an example of Christ.